I wanted to briefly share about what's happening in our marriage right now. We've been married for 25 years. We just recently had a breakdown which resulted in a separation. We've been separated for a couple of months. There are no guarantees - just a lot of unknowns right now. There definitely are strongholds/addictions which contributed to the crisis. Anyone out there going through the same thing? Would love to hear from you.
From experience, I can tell you that "strongholds/addictions" CAN be defeated with prayer and counseling. Some couples come through a separation stronger, but only if both are willing to work together to solve the problems. counseling is very important, because a good counselor will bring issues out in the open. I will be praying for both of you. Many people here have given you great honest advice. I agree with them that God has a plan for all of us for good. We just have to trust Him. This is not always easy. Some days you will feel like your heart was ripped from your chest, and other days you will go through most of the stages of grief (especially anger!) in a short time. You will get through this, no matter what happens. God is holding on to you & won't let you go!
My husband and I will celebrate 25 years in August, to which I am very pleased with. I too am co-dependent and suffer from depression. I am working on both with God's help. I can honestly say that it seems that marraige gets harder as you go. I think that you get into such a routine that you forget about the romance. I will pray for you, and please keep praying that God will help you and your husband to change to what He wants you to be, before it is too late. Marriage is an area where satan really seems to hit us. He knows that God is for it, so he is against it.
Keep your chin up. I will be praying for all of you in this discussion. Please pray for me.
Kathy Leach said:
I too, have been married for 25 years now and we're experiencing a lot of the same things that you are! We are, however, not separated, but getting very close to this! Our problem here is the fact that I suffer from Codependency and are Bipolar I. This doesn't help our situation out at all. In addition to this, we a struggling with the fact that our teen-age daughter, who is 16, had completely blown up at us this past Tuesday and staying with a close friend and her family, and is refusing to come home! All I do is pray everyday for strength and guidance! I will pray for you as well as this is a terrible time for the both of us. Having the problem of addictions/strongholds doesn't make any matters better! You honestly feel that you're grasping at the air and can't hold on to anything! I hope that my message gives you the knowledge that you're not alone and that there's someone out there who is struggling right a long with you. Hope to hear from you and may God keep you strong during all of this.
I share your story and pain. My husband has smoked pot since he was 12 over the years and I come from a family of acholics. My older bother commited sucide because of his liver being gone. My God anwers prayers beyond any explaination. My husband did time and I had to carry the load of a business and home and a 50 hour a week job. I always watch other wives and husband live their life in Christ and honestly I thought "what the hell". Only he knew what he was doing but, darn it I was mad. In time he says and now my husband leads the worship band and God has our life. I had separated twice from him. Guess what? God never separated from either of us.