When A Steady Relationship with Someone of the Opposite Gender Doesn't Work Out AT CHURCH! And Seeking Sun Night Baptist Church in Atl Metro Area

   I really liked this fellow at church for a long time.  We started going out for awhile outside of church. I also started sitting with him at church every time he was there.  I put the moves on him big time last year but in a casual short of way on Facebook messages because I was afraid of rejection.  He didn't fall for it but he was gentile.  He didn't judge me for it.  I was pretty hurt though because even though he handled it gently, I knew he didn't love me as much as I loved him.  Which I knew that before because he was very slack in returning my messages.  But then I was also reaffirmed through his responce to my moves.I actually stupid back then and I really repented to the Lord and distanted myself from Him and refocused my priorities on the Lord.

 Anyway enough of that.

 I started limiting myself from talking to him as much.  I would still sit with him in church however.  Then at first of the year, my sister announced her marrage and him and I happened to go out to eat.  I told him I would be going to California and I would have to put my dog in a kennel.  He volunteered to watch my dog.  So when it was a week before the wedding, I hollered at him several times and finally he returned my call.  He said we could get together after church and go over the arrangements but he would be late because he was going to pick up the women he had been seeing.  My heart stopped and it killed me.  I still went to church but I knew I couldn't see them together so I went in through a side door after Sunday School and sat up front as I knew he would be sitting in the back.  The revivial preacher already was briefed of what was going on.  During the closing prayer, people started slipping out to get the food ready for dinner on the ground.  I slipped out and pilled out of there without running into them.  During that day, I thought about leaving my church for a while but I wanted to go to the rest of the revivial for that week.  Well the fellow, I liked called me three times into Wednesday and I ignored his calls.  Finally before going into church that Wednesday night, I listened to a voice mail where he would be there that Wed night.  I went into with some friends from a sister church he couldn't stand and did't look around but I knew he was there because I saw his car.  I sat with my friends that I knew he couldn't stand so he wouldn't bother me.  Then during the service, I made the mistake of looking behind me and I saw him with his girl friend wrapped all around him and she was staring right at me.  I sobbed the whole service and during prayer time I wiped my face.  After the service I buried my head into a friend's chest that doesn't go there but knew about the situation.  He prayed for me and then I found the preacher's wife and asked if I could speak to the preacher and her in private.  We went into the office downstairs and they shut the door.  I told them that I had a stronghold and I was going to need to leave awhile.  They asked what it was and I told them the situation but not who it was.  I told them I wanted to keep everything private as I didn't want strive or gossip and I didn't want anybody talking about him.  I told them they did nothing wrong and that I loved them.  They understood and asked if I was going to be going to their friend's church and I said yes and meant it.  I've been going to a friend's church which they also know and a church downtown.  I just couldn't handle seeing the two of them together and had trouble concentrating with him being there. That was 3 months ago.

     I am still not back at my home church as I decided I will return there next summer.  Don't want to go back to soon as I'm really growing right now and want to keep growing. The time away has been great.  Been able to fully concentrate and I healed and got my peace back and now I'm with people I'm realing learning alot from.  In the month of October, the church I have been going to, the preacher is having someone fill in for him on Sunday nights.  And I've noticed there isn't a whole lot of Baptist Churches around here(Atl Metro Area) that have a Sunday night service.  So my question to the group is have any of you ever been in a situation like this at your church and if so, what did you do or is any of you in a situation like this now?  And do yall know of some good Baptist Churches in the Atlanta metro area that have a Sunday night service and if so please name it and tell me what time.  Thank you so much.  The Lord is good all the time.  May God Bless You!

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Replies to This Discussion

Charles Stanley would definite be my choice of pastors in the Atlanta area! God bless, Jan
Thank u Jan. i have been going to his church most of the Sunday AM services while I've been away from my home church. I absolutely love it. The only thing is they don't have a Sunday night PM service so I'm still looking around for a good baptist church Sunday Pm service and where I been going, the preacher is not going to be preaching in the Sunday PM,the whole month of October. I looked online and can't find anything. Thanks again.

If you are still looking for a Sunday PM service, I would recommend University Baptist Church at 1375 Fernwood Circle NE in Brookhaven.

Thank you so much Matthew.  I really appreciate that as I am still looking for a Sunday night service.  I'll check it out. Thanks again.

Matthew Mason said:

If you are still looking for a Sunday PM service, I would recommend University Baptist Church at 1375 Fernwood Circle NE in Brookhaven.

Wow, I was in a similar situation some years back and my church is small. This fellow gave me signals and when i confronted him on it he told me that he has never had any interest in me. His body language said very different things. That went on for a few seasons and my church became VERY small. I didn't switch because I had no where else to go, I just sat as far away from him as possible. My best friend was a great comfort to me during that time and it did teach me a great deal about myself as well as what to expect from a Christian man.

Currently, another fellow in my church and I started sitting together last summer. We belonged to the same small group, he had broken up with his gf a few months prior and he was quite responsive. Over time though, I think people started asking him about 'us' and he started sitting away from me but in the same section. I think he has stuff he is contending with but is he interested in me? I don't know! When he started to pull away I talked to a friend and told her I should probably sit somewhere else and she rebuked me saying that you should sit where you like to sit because I belong right where I am regardless of what might or might not be going on.

I know that I will not chase a man. If he wants to pursue something then he can get off of his keester and do something about it. His life is very busy, he is a single dad with two young boys. I think he will figure out what he wants and if it is me then great, if not, my place is not going to change in the church family. All I can do is seek Jesus, His wisdom, and honour myself mind, soul and body. I really do hope he gets on board, but if not then I have to trust that I will be pursued by the very man the Lord has for me and no one else.

Thank you Ronalda for sharing.  I hope things are going better for you now.  I ended up leaving my old church permanately and it was only going to be temporary but the Lord called me to the church I had been visiting.  I ignored that call for a while but finally gave in because the Holy Spirit kept pressing me harder and harder where I couldn't stand it anymore.  I joined and have so much peace about it and am so happy there.  I am in women's groups and making alot of female friends.  I haven't been on here on a long time but my new year's resolution for 2014 was to get on her reguarly.  Praying for you.


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