Ron, I read your story and would like to give you a word of encouragement.  I married for the first time at the age of 40 so I know something about where you are coming from. I now have a wonderful wife and 2 awesome children. I love them dearly, so let me speak to as someone who has been where you are and am now on the other side. Don't believe the lie; the lie being that you need something else to fill the void you feel in your life. Jesus Christ is your best friend, truly, and He is all you need.  Use this time to draw near to Him. Place your Focus on Him, and treasure the time you have to do this. I understand the desire to have a wife and family and having attained, I can tell you I need Christ more than ever.  I also have a job that I have had for almost ten years.  With all these things come demands and responsibilities that can drain your life dry without the grace of God.  Trust me, I know! I have tried to do, live this, mostly in my own strength having strayed somewhat from my first love. Without keeping Christ first and foremost in my life, I have experienced feelings of failure, emptiness, insecurity, and loneliness (no one understands), really, a sense of being totally bankrupt and at my wits end (that's being married with kids).  I am slowly returning to Christ, my all and all, who without Him, the marriage doesn't work well and the kids don't receive the love and attention they need.  I blame myself for everything, getting caught up in the merry-go-round of life as we know it in our culture.  I also did not have, and do not have very good skills and tools to have successful relationships. I am still selfish and self-centered which is the crux of the problem. My point is we get caught up in the notion that something, whether it be a wife, a house, car, whatever... will fill the void and make us complete...if I only had....  It just isn't true in my opinion.  Jesus Christ is the only thing that will fill the void and make us complete. I am just now learning this after many years.  We are complete in Him!  We try to get what we already have in Him. Remember what Paul said, It is better to be as he is... though God gives the grace! Give it to God.  I know friends who are your age and a bit older and both of them desired to get married for years, which they did recently.  How much time I and they spent on thinking about a spouse and family.  It can become an obsession like anything else. I once heard a minister say that marriage is a sanctifying experience.  Believe me, it is not without pain, hardships, misunderstandings, and trials. I am not saying give up hope, or stop believing for a spouse; I am encouraging you to give this to God and let Him work it out. Focus on Him! Treasure this time as an opportunity to get closer and more intimate with Him. Know Him! He is your best friend!!!! He knows what is best for you! He works all things for good for those that love Him! And don't obsess; let Him fill you with Himself, the only thing that will satisfy and make you feel whole and complete.  

Dear Ron,

I didn't mean that you should go home just to ask for money, food or whatever.  The Lord tells us in John 15:12 "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you." .  If you have issues with your family, now is the time to swallow your pride and make up with them.  They are your family and you need them now.  At some point in the future they may need you as well.  God doesn't want us to be enemies with anyone. 

In any case.  There are many churches (go to a good BIBLE teaching church like Calvary Chapel) that have programs for food and shelter for people in your situation.  Also are you on unemployment?  Food Stamps?  I don't know what is available in your area but surely there are programs there.  My advice is to pray and go make up with your family.  Sure it will be hard, but worth it in the long run.

I am 24 and i don't have a cell phone because i don't want to depend on anything but God.  Times are tuff but it sounds too me like your grandmother really loves you and you shouldn't take that for granted.  Maybe you will be in the same cituation but maybe not.  Florida is a new place and maybe a new opportunity God wants to open up for you, you can't ignore that.  And not every Great christian person lives constantly in the word.  Thats why we need church.  So we have a place we all can come together and worship.  I think definetly you should go to a church.  Maybe not the ones that never responded(and don't feel so bad about that, churches these days are strapped and possibly they never got the message from you, or something someway happend to it) but starting fresh at a new church where nobody knows you might be good, you can find some new people that really care about you.  We all need someone in our lives who can help us embrace God's word through our relationships.  When I got married my pastor told me that marraige was for me to love God thru my husband. 

I believe it to be the same with every friendship and relationship we have. I really think you should get to a payphone and try to contact your grandmother.  Maybe she has the means to get you to her.  Bus tickets aren't much and maybe when you get on your feet you can pay her back.  And so you can probably get around by foot or little to no gas.  Through God there is always a way.  Also I wouldn't worry about the tithing.  You give when you feel ready, and you give however much your comfortable with.  I know this is long already, but i went to a church full of karin people from burma and when it came time to give tithe, all the children with a dollar, quarter, change  from the ground gave everything they had.  The parents gave everything they could and God blessed them. Just like he will bless you.